Thursday 1 July 2010

Pre season has been cancelled for Davey Mac who has booked a last minute six week trip to Uganda.

Macca is hairier than your average ape so he should fit in well and he promises a photo with a giant chimp sharing a cup of tea from his Casuals mug. It?ll be like a scene from the old PG tips adverts.

Gaffer Skelly is worried that he may get mistaken for a hairy ape and get hunted for his paws but, as Brainy pointed out, he tracks gorillas, chases monkeys, herds lions and spears Kudus every Saturday night at B@1 so he should be safe enough.

Uganda shares a border with Kenya, a country triple ex Gaffer Phil Malcolm is visiting in a couple of weeks to go on safari and check out the local stamp scene. It would appear unlikely that the pair will arrange to meet however as they have not spoken since Phil's infamous 'Kill Phil' karate kick against South African outfit Bar Sia in pre-season several years ago which shocked Davey so much he reversed him decision to join the Casuals.

Macca's trip to Africa coincides with that of the Putney Plonkers, Lord Lurch and Ollie the Toff, who have flown out (first class) to watch the World Cup (is that still going on? - Ed). Ex Casuals Stoker, Barnyard and Dan Bennett are also out there but no one?s told Singapore based Benno that England have gone home.

In other news, Gav Wall?s house warming party was lit up by his unique canapes. Gav is a keen tropical fish keeper and a few Casuals (mentioning no names) sprinkled his canapes with fish food. Always up for the laugh Gav, decided to hand them out anyway and when one of his unsuspecting guests ate one and asked him if they were fish flavour he said "no bacon!"

Sadly Gav?s night was ruined by legendary former Casual James Brack who took to opening bottles of beer on his kitchen units causing considerable damage. "He needed a new kitchen anyway" said the Horse.